Our FOUR Little Ducks (formerly Our Three Little Ducks :)~

I'm a mom to FOUR amazing kids, one of which was adopted from South Korea. Our family is wild and crazy, and REALLY LOUD but lots of fun. Oh, and my new favorite quote is: "HAVING KIDS IS LIKE BEING PECKED TO DEATH BY A DUCK." So so so true.

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Location: United States

I am currently a SAHM, but prior to leaving my job I was a labor and delivery nurse. I really miss work, but I enjoy being home with my kids (most of the time anyway!).

Friday, February 29, 2008

Arie's developmental evaluation was today.

So today was Arie's second Early Intervention eval (he had when he was under a year and was about 6 months behing then). Quick history... Arie's Korean mom drank 2-3 shots of sojo per week. Not a TON, but after more research I have learned that poor nutrition can GREATLY effect how a fetus reacts to alcohol, and I'm sure that the nutrition status of his Umma (Korean mom) was not great.

I always see lots of "attachment" stuff in relation to international adoption, but nobody really EVER talks about alcohol exposure which is very common for our kids, and may be cause for lots of the problems I see and read about in the adoption community. PLEASE read below about Arie and, if your child was exposed to alcohol in-utero, read the CDC check list I provided. Let me quickly make it clear that I don't fault/blame Arie's Umma for drinking. I have never lived in her shoes, and I'm sure she did the best she could with the situation she was in. I, personally think that FAE/FASD/FAS needs to be talked about more in relation to adoption(assuming there are others whose children are coping with it) because it is a medical diagnosis, and not something to be ashamed of or something that needs to be hidden. Just my opinion.

Anyway, we have so many issues with Arie including:

-difficulty sleeping/ poor sleeping pattern
-eating aversion (as evident by his feeding tube :? )
-MAJOR hyperactivity
-clumsiness (he runs and falls, is off balance, trips, and basically just flits -about like a rabbit on crack :roll: ).
-irrational behavior/tantrums
-difficulty calming down from tantrums
-self harm such as hitting himself, pulling his own hair, scratching his face

All of this, once again, leads to a possible diagnosis of Fetal Alcohol Effects (basically the same as Fetal Alcohol Syndrome without any of the physical features). We need to have him evaluated by a geneticist (from what I've been told) to get an official diagnosis, but he is probably still too young for that.

Here is a link for more info on Fetal Alcohol Effects or Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder from the CDC: www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/fas/fasask.htm

And here is a list of symptoms/signs from the CDC:
Small size for gestational age or small stature in relation to peers
Facial abnormalities such as small eye openings
Poor coordination
Hyperactive behavior
Learning disabilities
Developmental disabilities (e.g., speech and language delays)
Mental retardation or low IQ
Problems with daily living
Poor reasoning and judgment skills
Sleep and sucking disturbances in infancy

Ok... onto Arie. Well Arie (now 22 months) was assessed as falling between a 12month - 18m level, so he was shown to be functioning at a 15m level with global delays in social, gross motor, fine motor, speech, feeding. There were some things between 12-15m level that he couldn't do, and some between 15-18m that he could do.

They are going to do a PT eval because of his clumsiness and poor balance, but most likely all of that (and everything else) is due to attention/ lack of self-regulation/ hyper activity/ sensory integration.
So I guess we're in for lots of Occupational Therapy in addition to all of the Feeding Therapy (which includes speech, and Psych) that he's already getting. AHHHHH!!! :shock:

That's pretty much it. They are also going to test his hearing because of the balance problems, but I'm fairly certain the results will be normal.

He is such an energetic happy boy most of the time. I hope that I am giving him everything he needs to succeed in life. It's hard because I'm scared that I'm missing something. UGH!

Thanks for your continued prayers and support the past year +. It's been a bumpy road, but hopefully he will soon be getting all of the services that he needs.


Blogger Cindy said...

Busy Momma! I am so glad that you are willing to speak honestly about things. It will help many moms in the future. Best Wishes to all of you.

6:36 PM  
Blogger Becky said...

I'm sure you are giving Arie exactly what he needs! Kudos to you for being so on-top of things and just accepting it when people would say, "Oh, he's just little" or "He'll eat when he's hungry."

Prayers for you and your family as your continue on your journey.

2:00 AM  
Blogger R&H said...

I think a lot of people are under the impression that women in Asian countries do not drink, or do drugs...which is really not true. Things are changing fast, especially in Vietnam. I believe most of the children in my daughters orphanage were children of drug addicted mothers with HIV.
Anyway- I'm glad you are getting services to help you and Arie.

12:14 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Blessings to you and your family for adopting. Both of our sons are "chosen babies." Our youngest (now 19) has been with us since he was a day old. He displayed signs similar to what you are experiencing. We went through many diagnoses including ADHD and FAS. It turns out he is bipolar and high functioning Autistic, something called Asperger's Syndrome. I am not qualified to make a call for your son, of course, but you may want to consider this. Once we found out, it made all the difference. He is a healthy, loving boy and graduated high school. Again, blessings with your family and your coming new addition. Steve Kirk blogs on senior health at www.theperfectsense.com.

10:43 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I have to agree with the post above me. I never drank during pregnancy but my little girl is Autistic. You might want to have him checked out for that. :)

7:23 PM  

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